He sighs at the lack of remorse in his generation

A few weeks ago, we were having a class discussion in English about whether or not we are responsible for accidentally causing a friends death. The situation described was that I am at a party and I convince my friend to drink alcohol. We are both very drunk and decide to jump off the roof into the pool and my friend does not make it.

What shocked me, was how many of my friends were saying that it is completely not my fault, or their own and that the friend in question has free will. Every one seemed to agree that it was his choice to drink the alcohol in the first place. It's really something that I've noticed a lot in our generation.

It seems like everyone just wants to hide, they don't want the responsibility. So many of us want to live in ignorance, because ignorance is bliss and all that any one seems to care about is being happy. We hide away and try to deny our own association in every action and put the blame on others.

While I agree that it is not completely my own fault in this situation, I would destroy my self with guilt. It is I who convinced my friend to drink and what ever happened after wards is the reaction to my action (in a physics way). It is the butter fly effect. It is because I was the one who offered my friend a drink that his parents have to cry, that there is one seat empty at their dinner table, that they never get to see their sons graduation.

In our discussion, the matter was more on whether we should be found guilty of manslaughter or not. I don't agree with that for sure, even if it is our fault, I don't think we should punished that harshly for something that was more of an accident than anything. This is not the point of the post though, it is the reaction that everyone seems to take. Everyone argued that they had nothing to do with his death and he could have avoided it easily.

Do you forget? That in our society there is no free will. Many say "no once can force you." Of course they can force you, and people do force you. Maybe not forcefully but psychologically for sure. Think about my friend in this situation, he is given a choice of becoming a social out cast, to not really belong, to never really belong with his friends, or to drink with them. In a society that forces people to conform to belong, this boy really has no choice.

When he takes the drink, he thinks about the consequences which WILL happen, such as becoming an outcast. Not only at the party, but as general in his social group. If he is to deny a drink now, not knowing that taking the drink would cause his death, he would pretty much be denying drinks every time it is offered. The consequence? He won't be a part of the social group in which the act of consuming alcohol is commonly performed. He knows this.

What he does not think about are the consequences which CAN happen, such as him falling off a roof and dying. This is what his choice is based on.


Now, if I was the one who offered him the drink in the first place, that put him under pressure and created a situation where he was forced to choose, I would feel absolutely horrible. His death is 100% my fault and not as much his own. Even if it wasn't me who offered the drink per say, but rather just drank at the party, I would feel horrible for his death, because I too contributed to the social pressure.

I sigh, I sigh deeply at how my generation tries to run away. I know I'm over viewing and stereotyping here, I know there are others out there who would live their entire life in immense guilt, there are others who would commit suicide out of the guilt of their actions. But from this set of data, as well constant observations on the smallest things I have really started to believe that there is in general a serious lack of remorse in our society.

A smaller example I've seen before, is asking a friend to print something and him/her forgetting to do so. The next day when I ask, they say that they forgot mono tonally and without remorse and when I QQ a bit, they cry out "Well it's your fault your printer wasn't working." I mean really?

Or when asking a friend to edit an essay and their edit causes me to lose a mark. When I show them this, more jokingly and they go "Well, it's your fault for not re editing." Yes, it is my fault for not re editing, but do you really have such little remorse, when I had such faith in your judgement?

Maybe, hopefully YOU are one of the people who does feel immense guilt. I know it sounds masochistic, but guilt is actually a really good thing, I think. It allows an individual to grow, to create a moral compass. Guilt causes us to not do bad things, it allows us to feel for others, and thus gain empathy. Guilt can form bonds between friends and family, it can be what allows us to keep our friends. It can cause us to do great things for another.

I don't mean to criticize too much in this post, I know that this may seem offensive to many of you and many of you will think I am an idiot. I am an idiot to be honest. I know that I have no gate way into your mind, that I cannot see what you are really thinking, what you are really feeling and you are right. Maybe you are feeling immense guilt every time? But then the question arises of why you hide it? Maybe I'm just being an idiot. But please try to remember the purpose of this blog. This blog is not there to give concrete definitions of society. Rather, it is a description of how I perceive it. It is a collection of my thoughts and ideas, of the impression that society imprints on MY mind.

He wonders why

Why do you brood so much
Over things that should not occupy so much time

Why do you worry
about who you are?
No,
About who you are to others?

Why do you change?
Not for yourself,
but for others?

Have you no faith
in your friends
to believe
in you?

Or is it because of what you do?
Do you harshly gaze upon others
and fear the same in return?


Have you forgotten,
that in the end we are all so selfish,
that no one cares about who you are
they only care about who they themselves are